Lessons in Submission – Lesson #4


Last Sunday, tragedy knocked on our door and tried to take a foothold. Fear was right behind, along with doubt, anger, and grief. My Sir discovered his 87 year old father unconscious and barely breathing. We were both initially shocked, as anyone would be, but we moved forward into the unknown. I started to become overwhelmed, which was exacerbated by the fact that we had just come off of our Yom Kippur fast the night before and we just had a week of very hard weather that was taking a toll on many where we live. We both went into autopilot/survival/necessity mode.

Inevitable death is at our doorstep and we have had to make a series of very difficult choices for the future, but I believe we’ve used wisdom and because of that we have some peace.

“Another reason why people are feeling overwhelmed is because people are not in true survival or crisis mode as often as they have been in much of our history. The interesting thing about crisis is that it actually produces a type of serenity. Why? Because in a crisis, people have to integrate all kinds of information that’s potentially relevant; they have to make decisions quickly, they have to then trust their intuitive judgment calls in the moment. They have to act. They’re constantly course-correcting based on data that’s coming up, and they’re very focused on some outcome, usually live – you know, survive. Don’t burn up. Don’t die.”

– David Allen as quoted in the Atlantic

We can let the example and repercussions of a poorly lived life make us retreat and hide or we can take hold of the life we have right now and live it. We had an amazing talk the other night and made some decisions the suit us. I am happy to say that we choose life! We don’t want to wait any longer for those things that truly make us happy. “Let’s wait until next year” has turned into “Let’s do this right now!” We talked about how we can accomplish what we want in the here and now. We also made the firm decision that even if we don’t fully understand everything, he is my Dominate and I am his submissive and it’s never going away. This is who we are.


Your Domination and submission will be put through many tests along the way. How will you stand? We have chosen free-fall into total abandon. No holding back.

Therapy Spanking

I’m not talking about Domestic Discipline, Take in Hand, punishment, or an erotic prelude. I’m talking about spanking as a means of catharsis, healing, and stress relief.

Last week I received a spanking that helped me connect and center myself. It calmed me and put my mind at ease. It had nothing to do with showing me who’s in charge, correcting an action, or as a start to some playtime. The spanking was a way for us to draw closer on a primal level. We often ignore that side of ourselves and label it dark and dirty. Your primal self doesn’t mean evil and it doesn’t mean uncivilized, either. Your primal instincts are purely about feelings on the most basic level and not disguising all of your feelings with years of layers designed to keep people from seeing your core. The problem occurs when we cannot even see our own core anymore. We lose sight of who we really are, and most times, before we ever find out in the first place.

I have come to realize that spanking immediately opens me up and helps me think about what lives inside me and my deepest, darkest desires. Bringing your desires into the light isn’t about turning something bad into something good (what we think is bad can easily be imposed restrictions based on fear) or even about being able to see everything clearly (although that is certainly part of it). Admitting your darkest desires just means you can truly live with yourself.

Back to therapy spanking…

Frequent non-sexual spanking are one of my darkest desires…

To have genuine and complete catharsis…

To release…

To be vulnerable…

To trust…

To connect…

To be free.

Further Sources: